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View Profile Clavactis
I am indeed a person of the house that you can see from the street over looking that place where I was once in the old times back when computers were made of raptor candy bars and Tom Brainy ate jelly beans cause heard it was good for his mom or something

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Ima Widget

University of mispeling

There! Right there!

Joined on 7/20/10

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Clavactis's News

Posted by Clavactis - July 25th, 2010


I'm not a great artist, I lack the patience to make and decent flashes, and I lack any program to make music to put on here. I can however, write fairly well.

So I think newgrounds need a literature portal for people like me. Now, if they already do, please tell me, and spare me further embarrassment from other users who read this.

Also, if for some reason they is no chance of this ever happening, tell me that also, I know they don't allow actually photographs, is it the same with literature? Or is it just the fact that its too hard to tell if its plagiarized or not?

If this were to ever happen I would quickly post at some of the works I already have, and I would make more on my own time and post them here as well, and I'm sure there are other who would also, so it would be something for newgrounds to consider.


Posted by Clavactis - July 22nd, 2010


I hadn't done any posts yet, and the thing at the top said why not make one now, and i couldn't think of a good reason not to, so i am (run on sentence FTW!).

There once was a guy who said to god that he didn't like the fact that tree had supper with his girlfriend the hippo now and then but god didn't care because his mother had come over and he had to make room for her enormous girth. This girth had come about because a bunch of nickels fell out of Santa's pocket (by the way, did you know St. Nicholas (Santa Clause) is the patron saint of hookers?) these nickels, it turned out, had raced around the planets so many times that they had grown tired of pudding and there for were eating bacon for brunch, not for breakfast though, for breakfast they had pennies topped with portal cake (because the cake isn't a lie, it just isn't for you, it's for the nickels.) But for dinner the nickels most just watch the stars go whizzing around the universe, but the stars themselves are playing hopscotch, completely unaware of the whole whizzing all about the place thing, which is probably good because if they did know they would probably get very dizzy (according to a law I just made up, if you're not aware of it, it doesn't exist or isn't happening, and therefore doesn't affect you). It's like the cast in the box, but not really. Anyways, back to the stars. After the stars all though playing hopscotch (the nickels have now grown tired and have gone to bed, so we won't be hearing form them again) the stars go to the moon to have a boxing match. The red dwarfs, being the weakest of the group are allowed to team up against the massive blue giants. Now usually the giants still win, but once in awhile one loses, and they go into rage because they are emotionally unstable do to the steroids they took to get so big, and they explode in a giant fireball. Science, upon seeing this fireball, decided to call it a super nova (because things with "super" before them get much more attention, just think about it, do you think super man would be as popular if he was just called man? no, he wouldn't.) anyways science decided to make up a reason for the super novas (as they had no idea about the whole stars boxing on the moon thing). And now science all thinks it's all high and mighty cause it thinks it figured out the cause of exploding stars, but the jokes on them cause their not even close! THE END